Wednesday, 30 May 2012
Somebody Link This to Me When I Backslide
No more complaining. Only doing or fixing or getting over or standing up for. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a science lab to complete.
Tuesday, 29 May 2012
Go Out Into the World and be Mediocre!
Right now, most high school almost-graduates are flipping just a little bit of shit. Everyone has to think about the future. Some people have parents who are predisposed to do a lot of that thinking for them. However, it is still up to the almost-graduates to make their own decisions, if they plan to be relatively happy with how their lives turn out. Their parents aren't going to live their futures for them. But I digress...
High school is all about grades. It is all about getting the highest grades possible so that you can prove that you're a smarter, harder worker than everybody else. It's a competition. It is supposed to be about acquiring knowledge and figuring out what interests you and learning self-discipline. Ha. That's a very noble goal. High school is not a noble place. In high school, acquiring knowledge is unnecessary as long as you can remember something long enough to puke it out onto a test; who cares if you've actually benefitted from the class, as long as you pass it? In high school, interests are certainly not cultivated, broad music classes and sports teams aside; if they were, why would my school have so few clubs that the Yearbook Exec had to scramble to find enough to fill a page? And self-discipline? You've got to be kidding me. I'm writing this blog instead of writing an overdue lab report about pee. Self-discipline in high school consists of being able to hold your liquor, not talking back so much that your teacher actually punishes you, and handing in your assignments before the teacher refuses to mark them.
We're supposed to be "acquiring knowledge". LEARNING. But even I can't say that I'm trying very hard to do so. All I want to do is pass the test and get out. Only I also want to learn. I keep saying that I'll learn more tomorrow; I'll learn when I have the time, when I'm not busy doing busy work. I have to make time. I'm lazy, and that needs to change if I plan to live a life worth being proud of. Not everybody seems to care so much about pride of accomplishment, of learning for the sake of bettering yourself. You can't force people to learn. You can stick them in a chair and talk at them and be all big and scary and tell them how their future will be so much more open if they actually try, but you can't make them try. Motivation has to come from them, and if they don't have it, all you can do is struggle and scream and push until they pass the test. High school is all about creating functional members of society. It teaches you to conform; sticks you in a giant machine that makes a really ominous whirring sound and tries to scare you into getting good grades because that means that you get to have a future.
I understand: people do need to be functional members of society. We can't just have a bunch of lazy bums wandering around, leeching off other people and doing nothing to contribute. But it makes me sad that all high school does is encourage mediocrity, even if it is unwittingly. It might tell us to thrive and to think and to be creative and to be innovative. But when your teacher lets slide a deadline because nobody did the work, because everybody was so busy with the bajillion other things they need to do to graduate, it makes me wonder if this system, overloading people who have not yet fully matured with pile of work to do, is actually the best approach. We could get it done if we tried. I truly believe that. We don't need to be on Facebook updating our statuses about how much homework we have instead of actually doing our homework. But we're not getting it done. Personally, I'm not getting it done because I'm not motivated, because my whole life I've have been told that the test is the most important thing, and I'm starting to realize that it's not. Some of people aren't interested in their classes. Some do so much that they have to pick and choose what to care about. And some of us just don't like to be told that we have to do something-which I agree is a poor excuse for not doing something. But whatever the reason, we're not actually passionate about learning, at least in our current setting. We're passionate about passing. We're, however unwittingly, setting ourselves up to be merely functional. We need to figure out a different system; one that gives students the motivation and direction they need in order to actually find something they're passionate about. If they're passionate about it, they will try. Trust me.
I'm so caught up in shallow concern for what I'm supposed to be doing that taking time to do what matters to me feels like blasphemy.
Public education is better than no education. I believe that anybody should have the chance to learn. But that does not mean that everybody is going to take that chance. So many people waste their schooling. They are to blame for doing so. But the schools are letting them. The schools couldn't care less if the students are happy, or working to their full potential, or doing what they love. As long as the students aren't overly disruptive, do well enough to get a B, and end up as decent, tax-paying citizens, the schools brush off their hands and call it a day. Who cares if anything spectacular is created ever again? We just want to survive.
There's a reason Michelangelo and da Vinci existed so long ago. They didn't go to public high school.
High school is all about grades. It is all about getting the highest grades possible so that you can prove that you're a smarter, harder worker than everybody else. It's a competition. It is supposed to be about acquiring knowledge and figuring out what interests you and learning self-discipline. Ha. That's a very noble goal. High school is not a noble place. In high school, acquiring knowledge is unnecessary as long as you can remember something long enough to puke it out onto a test; who cares if you've actually benefitted from the class, as long as you pass it? In high school, interests are certainly not cultivated, broad music classes and sports teams aside; if they were, why would my school have so few clubs that the Yearbook Exec had to scramble to find enough to fill a page? And self-discipline? You've got to be kidding me. I'm writing this blog instead of writing an overdue lab report about pee. Self-discipline in high school consists of being able to hold your liquor, not talking back so much that your teacher actually punishes you, and handing in your assignments before the teacher refuses to mark them.
We're supposed to be "acquiring knowledge". LEARNING. But even I can't say that I'm trying very hard to do so. All I want to do is pass the test and get out. Only I also want to learn. I keep saying that I'll learn more tomorrow; I'll learn when I have the time, when I'm not busy doing busy work. I have to make time. I'm lazy, and that needs to change if I plan to live a life worth being proud of. Not everybody seems to care so much about pride of accomplishment, of learning for the sake of bettering yourself. You can't force people to learn. You can stick them in a chair and talk at them and be all big and scary and tell them how their future will be so much more open if they actually try, but you can't make them try. Motivation has to come from them, and if they don't have it, all you can do is struggle and scream and push until they pass the test. High school is all about creating functional members of society. It teaches you to conform; sticks you in a giant machine that makes a really ominous whirring sound and tries to scare you into getting good grades because that means that you get to have a future.
I understand: people do need to be functional members of society. We can't just have a bunch of lazy bums wandering around, leeching off other people and doing nothing to contribute. But it makes me sad that all high school does is encourage mediocrity, even if it is unwittingly. It might tell us to thrive and to think and to be creative and to be innovative. But when your teacher lets slide a deadline because nobody did the work, because everybody was so busy with the bajillion other things they need to do to graduate, it makes me wonder if this system, overloading people who have not yet fully matured with pile of work to do, is actually the best approach. We could get it done if we tried. I truly believe that. We don't need to be on Facebook updating our statuses about how much homework we have instead of actually doing our homework. But we're not getting it done. Personally, I'm not getting it done because I'm not motivated, because my whole life I've have been told that the test is the most important thing, and I'm starting to realize that it's not. Some of people aren't interested in their classes. Some do so much that they have to pick and choose what to care about. And some of us just don't like to be told that we have to do something-which I agree is a poor excuse for not doing something. But whatever the reason, we're not actually passionate about learning, at least in our current setting. We're passionate about passing. We're, however unwittingly, setting ourselves up to be merely functional. We need to figure out a different system; one that gives students the motivation and direction they need in order to actually find something they're passionate about. If they're passionate about it, they will try. Trust me.
I'm so caught up in shallow concern for what I'm supposed to be doing that taking time to do what matters to me feels like blasphemy.
Public education is better than no education. I believe that anybody should have the chance to learn. But that does not mean that everybody is going to take that chance. So many people waste their schooling. They are to blame for doing so. But the schools are letting them. The schools couldn't care less if the students are happy, or working to their full potential, or doing what they love. As long as the students aren't overly disruptive, do well enough to get a B, and end up as decent, tax-paying citizens, the schools brush off their hands and call it a day. Who cares if anything spectacular is created ever again? We just want to survive.
There's a reason Michelangelo and da Vinci existed so long ago. They didn't go to public high school.
Tuesday, 15 May 2012
Of Teddybears and Bedsheets
What's the deal with sleep? It seems as though it has always had this power over me. When I was a kid, sleep was something that was forced on me; I wanted to be mature and be a part of the action in those mysterious hours after I was told to put head to pillow. And then, as I started being able to stay up later and later because I learned that if I close the door to my room, my parents can't see that the light is still on, sleep became a thing of fond memories, sometimes resurfacing in the middle of Chemistry.
Sleep runs the show, no matter what.
I know that we need a certain amount to function, but I want to know why sleep is so important to me. Is it just because it feels good to lay there in comfort and be given a free pass to do absolutely nothing? That seems legitimate, but a lot of things are enjoyable. They don't dictate me like sleep does. Is it because I fear pain? I don't want to go through a day in discomfort? If I'm a little sore from going for a run (*gasp* Riley exercises?! It must be the apocalypse.) I still manage to get through a day just fine. I barely think about it. Is it because I want my mind to be as sharp as it can be? I haven't used a sharpener in years anyway, it's not like it makes too much difference. Plus, lack of sleep often gives me some of my most entertaining stories (see: Rita, the Family Friendly Pole Dancer).
So why is it that at the hour I feel I should be tucking myself in, if I am not doing so, the clock becomes all I can watch and I realize how quickly time is passing and how much sleep I am not going to get. I know that I'll be fine. This is not life threatening. What's the deal?
*lightbulb*
I'm a creature of routine. As much as I romanticize spontaneity, whenever my routine is broken, I go into my shell and try to keep myself as safe as possible. Change is only good if I control it. When I have to stay up late because I need to finish homework that I should've done eight hours earlier, it feels as if I'm not in control of what I'm doing. My procrastination got the better of me; past me is controlling present me. I like it when present me controls present me. It's nice. It is also a very rare occurance.
When I'm up late (early), not sleeping, it feels like I'm in this weird alternate universe, isolated, and it's a little lonely. My world is supposed to be asleep, but I'm fighting against that and it feels unnatural.
The overhead lights shouldn't stay on passed eleven. Then it can be bedside lamps until four for all I care. Reading into the morning feels natural. Typing and social networking and feeling my whole upper body cramp up from sitting hunched in the same position, does not.
Sleep is just another part of my old routine that I'm refusing to defend, along with caring about grades, and being quiet. On the upside, it never takes me long to fall asleep anymore. Head, pillow, out.
Sleep runs the show, no matter what.
I know that we need a certain amount to function, but I want to know why sleep is so important to me. Is it just because it feels good to lay there in comfort and be given a free pass to do absolutely nothing? That seems legitimate, but a lot of things are enjoyable. They don't dictate me like sleep does. Is it because I fear pain? I don't want to go through a day in discomfort? If I'm a little sore from going for a run (*gasp* Riley exercises?! It must be the apocalypse.) I still manage to get through a day just fine. I barely think about it. Is it because I want my mind to be as sharp as it can be? I haven't used a sharpener in years anyway, it's not like it makes too much difference. Plus, lack of sleep often gives me some of my most entertaining stories (see: Rita, the Family Friendly Pole Dancer).
So why is it that at the hour I feel I should be tucking myself in, if I am not doing so, the clock becomes all I can watch and I realize how quickly time is passing and how much sleep I am not going to get. I know that I'll be fine. This is not life threatening. What's the deal?
*lightbulb*
I'm a creature of routine. As much as I romanticize spontaneity, whenever my routine is broken, I go into my shell and try to keep myself as safe as possible. Change is only good if I control it. When I have to stay up late because I need to finish homework that I should've done eight hours earlier, it feels as if I'm not in control of what I'm doing. My procrastination got the better of me; past me is controlling present me. I like it when present me controls present me. It's nice. It is also a very rare occurance.
When I'm up late (early), not sleeping, it feels like I'm in this weird alternate universe, isolated, and it's a little lonely. My world is supposed to be asleep, but I'm fighting against that and it feels unnatural.
The overhead lights shouldn't stay on passed eleven. Then it can be bedside lamps until four for all I care. Reading into the morning feels natural. Typing and social networking and feeling my whole upper body cramp up from sitting hunched in the same position, does not.
Sleep is just another part of my old routine that I'm refusing to defend, along with caring about grades, and being quiet. On the upside, it never takes me long to fall asleep anymore. Head, pillow, out.
Monday, 7 May 2012
Beliefs?
Life sucks and then you die. Life is beautiful. Everything will be fine. If you're not attentive you will end up miserable. Life is meaningless unless you have someone to share it with. Don't define yourself by another person.
There are so many ways to view the world. I think I'm starting to figure out which views are mine.
There are so many ways to view the world. I think I'm starting to figure out which views are mine.
Sunday, 6 May 2012
A Prime Candidate for an Arranged Marriage
The guys I date fall into one of two categories:
1) People I'm not attracted to;
2) Douchebags
Awesome.
1) People I'm not attracted to;
2) Douchebags
Awesome.
Saturday, 5 May 2012
A Letter to All High School Guitarist Wannabees
TAB paper is not music.
If you are unable to read ACTUAL MUSIC, you are not a musician. I don't care how well you can play "Smoke on the Water" or "Hotel California" using a piece of TAB with the fingerings spelled out for you. Actually, I don't care if you can play "Smoke on the Water", period. Nobody wants to hear you play "Smoke on the Water". If you can't pick up a sheet of freaking music, put it in front of you, and learn a song from scratch, then you either need to learn how to do so, or put down the guitar and walk away. TAB is for lazy people.
TAB DOES NOT SHOW YOU RHYTHMS. One cannot get by with music that only shows pitch. Pitch is only part of the music. Rhythm is another, equally important part. So with TAB, one can only play songs that one already knows the rhythms to. Which roughly translates to "songs that one already knows". Which keeps from expanding one's musical horizons. News flash: Classic Rock isn't the only genre of music out there. I get it, you're cool and have excellent taste in music that you weren't alive to hear when it was released. Eric Clapton did it better than you. Get over it and play something new.
I can play TAB. Trust me, it's not difficult.
Your music teacher knows you've been playing the same three songs the entire year. He knows this because he's the one who assigned the songs to you. He is aware that you're not capable of handling anything more challenging. He is also aware of your attendance record. He is able to notice patterns and make connections. He knows that you can't play a scale to save your life. He judges you more than you realize. He's right. If you're not actually planning to learn anything in your music class, stop wasting the teacher's time while you sit there thinking you're hot shit because you can pluck out a few chords. Being a musician is not easy. If it's easy for you, you need to reevaluate how much respect you have for what you're doing. You also need to look down and see if your sheet music is comprised of notes, or of numbers on lines. If it is the latter, feel free to stop anytime you like.
You are not a musician. Learn to read music, or get out.
If you are unable to read ACTUAL MUSIC, you are not a musician. I don't care how well you can play "Smoke on the Water" or "Hotel California" using a piece of TAB with the fingerings spelled out for you. Actually, I don't care if you can play "Smoke on the Water", period. Nobody wants to hear you play "Smoke on the Water". If you can't pick up a sheet of freaking music, put it in front of you, and learn a song from scratch, then you either need to learn how to do so, or put down the guitar and walk away. TAB is for lazy people.
TAB DOES NOT SHOW YOU RHYTHMS. One cannot get by with music that only shows pitch. Pitch is only part of the music. Rhythm is another, equally important part. So with TAB, one can only play songs that one already knows the rhythms to. Which roughly translates to "songs that one already knows". Which keeps from expanding one's musical horizons. News flash: Classic Rock isn't the only genre of music out there. I get it, you're cool and have excellent taste in music that you weren't alive to hear when it was released. Eric Clapton did it better than you. Get over it and play something new.
I can play TAB. Trust me, it's not difficult.
Your music teacher knows you've been playing the same three songs the entire year. He knows this because he's the one who assigned the songs to you. He is aware that you're not capable of handling anything more challenging. He is also aware of your attendance record. He is able to notice patterns and make connections. He knows that you can't play a scale to save your life. He judges you more than you realize. He's right. If you're not actually planning to learn anything in your music class, stop wasting the teacher's time while you sit there thinking you're hot shit because you can pluck out a few chords. Being a musician is not easy. If it's easy for you, you need to reevaluate how much respect you have for what you're doing. You also need to look down and see if your sheet music is comprised of notes, or of numbers on lines. If it is the latter, feel free to stop anytime you like.
You are not a musician. Learn to read music, or get out.
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